you know we all grieve in different ways, but it seems that it all boils down to the same thing. the sadness, anger, denial, and how we sit around and tell funny stories and the good things. you know all that, we've all been through it. dying is a part of living, no matter how much we don't like it.
since he's passed away i've thought about all the loved ones i've lost. and i remember all the things that people told me to try and comfort me "i'm so sorry", "they're in a better place now", "they aren't suffering anymore" and they go on and on. oh how i hate those things. they are said to try to comfort, but sometimes i think they rub more salt in the wound.
i found myself today taking food to the family, and i saw my boss for the first time in 3 weeks, and i knew when i saw her i would cry. not because i'm sad her husband is gone, but because she hurts. we hugged and i heard myself say "i'm sorry!" oh how i wish i could take those words back, but i can't. i took a short drive around the block and thought, "i wish there were some new phrases we could say when someone died. something that might actually help them. but i know nothing that can be said or done could ever help bring comfort to the aching heart. as we stood there in the embrace, and my ever strong boss was crying, sobbing while we were hugging, we broke the embrace by talking about how the cats were doing. ahhh..... the relief of something alive, something light hearted! and at the same time the crying and the awkwardness seemed to dissipate too.
as much as we want to ignore death, or hide from it, or avoid those that are grieving so we don't have to deal with the aches in our heart, we can't. we might as well face the fact that we were born to live, and live to die.
sometimes we question why God allowed this to happen or that to happen, and why this person went and this one got to stay, but as Elisabeth Elliot would say "that's not our business, it's Gods."
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