tonight at church it was really good. our Pastor had back surgery on Thursday so was unable to preach tonight, so we opted for something a little different. Testimonies, it's always great to hear people's testimonies especially in our church. our church has 4 recovery programs, men's, women's, youth boys, and youth girls. we see God work in such amazing ways every single day, so the Men of the House were encouraged to get up and say a word, which was nice, normally the ladies take over the stage! lol...
anyway, it seemed that something kept coming up today and it was Psalms 139. this Psalm has very special meaning to me. a lot of the time i tend to doubt God's love for me. as Ms. Audrey would say, i think that God got me out of the nickle bin at Dollar General. so i think that God just tolerates me, not really love me. but reading this Psalm, making it personal helps a lot. while i was in Oaxaca a lady saw this in me. i don't remember her name, or if she even gave me her name, but she knew that i had a hard time with this. one night after a service in Oaxaca she came and told me "you are special, God loves you very very much and so do i. i want you to read Psalms 139 and later we will talk about it." i went to the hotel room and read it, however time did not allow us to get together so she could tell me all the things she wanted to tell me, but the memory lives on in my heart. i'm going to type out this Psalm, and i know that many of us could quote parts of it, and it so familiar, but i would like for you to read it slow, maybe out loud, and put yourself in it. make it personal. think that all the "me's" and "i's" are really talking about you, think that God had David write this just so you would know that you are loved. and after reading Psalms 139, there are lyrics to a Rich Mullins song called "nothing is beyond You." if you have never had the privilege of hearing Rich Mullins i'll tell you just a couple of quick things. he wrote the song "our God is an awesome God", he played the hammered dulcimer, he had a passion for life, and for Jesus and it shows through his music, he died in a Jeep accident in 1997, i cried that day, anyway, you should either 1) buy one of his c.d's or 2) download some of his music from itunes, it's really amazing. so without any further adue, here is Psalms 139 out of the HCSB:
Lord, You have searched me and known me.
You know when i sit and when i stand up;
You understand my thoughts from far away.
You observe my travels and my rest;
You are aware of all my ways.
before a word is on my tongue,
You know all about it, Lord.
You have encircled me;
You have placed Your hand on me.
this extraordinary knowledge is beyond me.
it is lofty; i am unable to reach it.
where can i go to escape Your Spirit?
Where can i flee from Your presence?
if i go up to heaven, You are there;
if i make my bed in Sheol, You are there.
if i live at the eastern horizon
or settle at the western limits,
even there Your hand will lead me;
Your right hand will hold on to me.
if i say "surely the darkness will hide me,
and the light around me will become night"-
even the darkness is not dark to You.
the night shines like the day;
darkness and light are alike to You.
for it was You who created my inward parts;
You knit me together in my mother's womb.
i will praise You,
because i have been remarkably and wonderfully made.
Your works are wonderful,
and i know this very well.
my bones were not hidden from You
when i was made in secret,
when i was formed in the depths of the earth.
Your eyes saw me when i was formless;
all my days were written in Your book and planned
before a single one of them began.
God, how difficult Your thoughts are
for me to comprehend;
how vat their sum is!
if i counted them,
they would outnumber the grains of sand;
when i wake up, i am still with You.
God, if only You would kill the wicked-
you bloodthirsty men, stay away from me-
who invoke You deceitfully.
Your enemies swear by You falsely.
Lord, don't i hate those who hate you,
and detest those who rebel against You?
i consider them my enemies.
search me, God, and know my heart;
test me and know my concerns.
see if there is any offensive way in me;
lead me in the everlasting way.
now for the lyrics:
Where could I go, where could I run
Even if I found the strength to fly
And if I rose on the wings of the dawn
And crashed through the corner of the sky
If I sailed past the edge of the sea
Even if I made my bed in Hell
Still there You would find me
'Cause nothing is beyond You
You stand beyond the reach
Of our vain imaginations
Our misguided piety
The heavens stretch to hold You
And deep cries out to deep
Singing that nothing is beyond You
Nothing is beyond You
Time cannot contain You
You fill eternity
Sin can never stain You
Death has lost its sting
And I cannot explain the way You came to love me
Except to say that nothing is beyond You
Nothing is beyond You
If I should shrink back from the light
So I can sink into the dark
If I take cover and I close my eyes
Even then You would see my heart
And You'd cut through all my pain and rage
The darkness is not dark to You
And night's as bright as day
Nothing is beyond You
You stand beyond the reach
Of our vain imaginations
Our misguided piety
The heavens stretch to hold You
And deep cries out to deep
Singing that nothing is beyond You
Nothing is beyond You
And time cannot contain You
You fill eternity
Sin can never stain You
And death has lost its sting
And I cannot explain the way You came to love me
Except to say that nothing is beyond You
Nothing is beyond You
Nothing is beyond You
now that it's all said and done, i'm glad i lost the first one, this one came out better! :)
